When You Lose Control

When I was alone, I felt that my world was falling apart. I failed in love, I lost some of my good friends, and I’m still fighting about this feeling of what the hell to do with my life. I lost control of myself. I did some stuff that I wish I didn’t. I was trying to save myself.

I met new friends along the way. Some of them stayed, some of them were gone now, and the others didn’t really matter. I have learned so many things from my past. Although I regret some of the actions I took, but all of those things made me a stronger person. I took the risk and I failed…. But I learned!

People can still change. I can still change. This year, I plan to re-create myself. With my family and friends, the people who love me, the people who stayed and will stay with me, with them I know I can do better this time, in life and in love.

When you lose control, you lose yourself too. There’s only one way to find yourself again, create yourself on your own. Be the best person you can be. Life is about taking chances, taking risks. So, take it!!! Love the people around you and let them feel how much they mean to you. Never expect, choose to be happy, choose to love and always pray to God for guidance.

I’m taking this leap again. I will jump, take control and be my own destiny.

Sacrifices

To what extent do you need to sacrifice for love?

Sacrifice is a very powerful word. It could make or break a relationship or a person. But as you love, sacrifices will always be there. You will never learn how to love unconditionally unless you learn how to sacrifice.

We had our first fight. Arguments were thrown and tears were shed. This was not the usual fight we had before. This was different. We were different. We were mature enough to handle the situation. We still had our differences but we were able to compromise this time. Love entails sacrifices. And now, we were on the ball to do these sacrifices as a couple.

I am happy how this day ended.

I chose to love! And I am happy about it!

@ 27

Turning 27 was something I’m not excited about. I hate aging! Haha! I don’t like it when people ask me about my age. I know it’s just a number but for me, age equates responsibilities. At this stage, I need to start fixing myself…. my life. I need to be more serious about everything now. I’m not getting any younger. There’s still more dreams to reach, more goals to achieve.

Last year was not a great year for me. The year started so bad. It ended, still with tears in my eyes. There were problems that were not solved, so many unanswered questions, failed hopes and shattered dreams, friendships and hearts broken. Every scar leaves a mark, it was hard for me then. I’m not trying to find the answers to all my questions anymore. All I want to think about is the present, what I have now. You have control of everything that’s happening to you. That’s what I’ve learned. You can choose how to live. Choose your life, and then live it!

2009 has taught me a lot of things, how to be a stronger person, how to love myself more, how to value the people who loves me and cares for me, how forget the past and deal with the future. Dwelling with your past will not do you any good. It would just bring back pain and remorse. You don’t need any of that in your life. I have a journal of the things I’ve learned and will be learning as I journey through life. I plan to share this to my kids as they grow up. I hope that this will help them to be tough kids like me. Tough times don’t always last, but tough people do.

As the year ends, I was excited about the coming year. I know 2010 will be a great year for me. Having a great perspective in life, a loving family and supportive friends, I know I’ll be great! I thought of having resolutions this year. I’m making a promise to myself to fulfill all of these before the year ends. I plan to become a better person this time. And I hope, I’ll do better in life this time too.

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1. Be closer to God.
2. Love myself more and love life.
3. Spend more time with my family and friends.
4. Spend wisely! Save more! No impulse buying this year.
5. Make time to do things that I love like reading, dancing and lomo-ing. =)
6. Find a new hobby (swimming or boxing).

One Last Dance

I decided to take it, one last time.
No questions.
No promises.
No false hopes.

Just me, being happy.
Letting fate write my own love story.

I’m going to have this one last dance with love again.

Bucket List # 4: Hairless!

Every woman's dream! ♥
I didn't think I can have summer perfect skin.
Thanks to Belo! Now, I'm flawlessly hairless!